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IELTS essay, topic: Some people argue that sports are essential, while others view sports as a leisure time activity (discuss + opinion)

IELTS Model Essay Sample Band 8 July 2023

This essay topic was seen in a recent IELTS test in Pakistan

Some people argue that sports are essential for us. Others think of sports as an activity for leisure time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Sample Band 8 Essay

Sports have always been an integral part of human society, dating back to ancient times. Today, the importance of sports is still widely debated. Some people argue that sports are essential for our physical and mental wellbeing, while others view sports as a leisure activity. Personally, I think of sports as a very important aspect of life and make an effort to be active on a daily basis.

Those who argue that sports are essential for us believe in the numerous benefits that sports offer. Firstly, sports help us to maintain a healthy lifestyle. By engaging in sports regularly, we can keep our bodies in good shape, improve our cardiovascular health, and gain muscle strength. Physical exercise helps reduce the risk of diseases such as obesity, heart disease, and diabetes. Moreover, sports can provide relief from stress and anxiety and contribute to better mental health. The social aspect of sports also promotes teamwork, leadership, and communication skills, which are valuable in personal and professional life.

On the other hand, some people see sports as an activity for leisure time. They believe that sports should not be overly emphasised in one’s life because of the limited value they provide, and that people should engage in sports only as a form of entertainment. In their opinion, sports should not be considered as a necessity but rather as an option for enjoyment.

Although there is some truth in both views, I believe that sports are essential for us. Firstly, the physical and mental benefits of sports cannot be ignored. A healthy body and mind are fundamental to the overall well-being of an individual, and sports provide an effective means of achieving both. Moreover, sports can teach us important life skills such as teamwork and communication, which are crucial in both personal and professional life.

In conclusion, sports can be seen as essential for our physical and mental well being, as well as a means of personal growth and development. While some may view sports as a leisure activity, I strongly believe that individuals should engage in sports in order to lead a healthy and fulfilling life.

Teacher’s feedback:

This essay is a solid example of a Band 8 level writing.

Task Response: Band 8
You’ve effectively addressed the task by discussing both views on the importance of sports and clearly stating your own opinion. Well done for arguing that sports are essential for physical and mental well-being, and providing a balanced discussion before concluding with your stance. This approach demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8
You’ve organised your essay well, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs for each viewpoint, and a conclusion that summarises your opinion. Your use of transition phrases like “Firstly,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” effectively guides the reader through your argument, enhancing the essay’s overall coherence and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 8
You’ve demonstrated a strong command of vocabulary, with terms such as “integral part,” “cardiovascular health,” “muscle strength,” and “overall well-being.” This varied and precise vocabulary helps to convey your ideas clearly and effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 8
You’ve showcased a wide range of grammatical structures accurately. Complex sentence structures, such as “By engaging in sports regularly, we can keep our bodies in good shape,” contribute to the clarity and sophistication of your writing. Your grammatical accuracy is consistently high, which supports the effectiveness of your argument.

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IELTS essay, topic: People in senior positions should be compensated with significantly higher salaries (agree/disagree)

IELTS Model Essay Sample Band 8 July 2023

This essay topic was seen in recent IELTS test in India.

People in senior positions should be compensated with significantly higher salaries than people in lower positions in the same company. Do you agree or disagree?

Give your own opinion and include relevant examples.

Compensation is a critical element in employee performance and retention. Senior positions in companies often come with higher salaries, but the extent of this gap has been a source of debate. While some argue that senior executives should be given significantly higher salaries than their lower-level colleagues, others believe in creating a more equitable compensation system that values employee contributions irrespective of their rank in the company. In my opinion, rather than a rank or title, compensation should be based on the value that a person delivers to the organisation.

One argument for compensating senior executives with higher salaries is that they carry more significant responsibilities and accountability than lower-level employees. Moreover, senior executives have often accrued years of experience and developed a unique set of skills that are not found in lower-level employees, which again supports compensation based on the seniority of employees in the company. In many companies there are managers who worked their way up and have contributed many years until they were promoted to the positions they are currently in; it is reasonable that they earn more than junior employees who are just starting out.

On the other hand, there are those who believe that excessive compensation gaps lead to inequality and can cause lower-level employees to lose morale and productivity. While it is true that senior executives carry a larger load of responsibilities, massive gaps in compensation can lead to resentment and dissatisfaction among the workforce. Furthermore, lower-level employees are often the ones responsible for the day-to-day operations of a company, which means that they contribute to the company’s overall success, and therefore, they should also receive fair compensation.

To conclude, there are compelling arguments for both sides of the compensation debate. Senior executives should be compensated fairly for the unique skills and increased responsibilities that come with their position, and to attract top-level talent to companies. However, this does not mean that lower-level employees should be denied the opportunity to earn a fair wage. Compensation, therefore, should be based on the value that an employee brings to the organization, rather than their rank or title.

Teacher’s feedback:

Overall, your essay is worthy of Band 8 in IELTS.

Task Response: Band 8
You’ve addressed the task effectively, presenting a clear position that compensation should be based on the value delivered to the organisation rather than rank. The argument is well-developed with logical reasoning for each side before concluding with your own opinion, which is a strong approach for this type of essay.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8
The essay is well-organised and logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the argument, contributing to a coherent overall structure. The use of cohesive devices like “on the other hand,” “moreover,” and “to conclude” effectively guides the reader through the argument, enhancing the essay’s clarity and flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 8
You’ve used a varied and sophisticated vocabulary to convey your message clearly and persuasively. Terms such as “compensation,” “equitable,” “resentment,” “dissatisfaction,” and “unique skills” are used appropriately, contributing to a precise and articulate discussion of the topic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 8
The essay demonstrates a strong command of grammatical structures. Complex and compound sentences are used effectively to convey nuanced ideas, and the grammatical accuracy is high. This allows for clear and effective communication of ideas.

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