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IELTS essay, topic: Some people believe that countries should produce all the food necessary to feed their populations and import as little food as possible (agree/disagree)

IELTS Model Essay Sample Band 8 October 2023

This essay topic was seen in recent IELTS test in India.

Some people believe that countries should produce all the food necessary to feed their populations and import as little food as possible. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In recent years the topic of food sovereignty has become a pressing issue for many nations. It is a commonly held belief that that countries should prioritise being self-sufficient by producing all the food necessary for their citizens instead of importing it. Although this viewpoint has its merits, I believe that this is not a feasible or beneficial option.

To begin, utilising local food production will enhance a country’s national security, as this will prevent international disputes that may occur over pricing and other financial issues related to importing goods, such as taxes and other costs. In addition, local food production will promote sustainable agricultural practices according to a country’s regional climates, which will preserve local biodiversity.

However, it must be noted that this method might not be beneficial for all nations, as not every country possesses arable land or a climate that is conducive to cultivating a variety of produce. For example, countries in colder parts of the world would not have access to tropical fruits like mangoes or bananas. Therefore, importing food is vital to provide a variety of food items as well an ensuring that certain items are available even during off seasons or other times of shortage. I also believe that being exposed to food items from other countries can add to our cultural diversity and enrich our culinary experiences.

In conclusion, while it might be beneficial for some nations to strive for food self-sufficiency, for many others this approach is unrealistic and could deprive a large part of the world of the broader benefits of global trade. Therefore, a balanced combination of domestic production and imports would be a more suitable option.

Teacher’s feedback:

This essay is a great example of Band 8 level writing.

Task Response: Band 8
The essay effectively addresses the task by presenting a clear opinion on the issue of food sovereignty. The writer discusses the advantages of local food production for national security and sustainable agricultural practices while acknowledging the limitations due to varying climates. The essay also recognises the importance of imports for variety, availability, and cultural enrichment. The opinion is well-developed and supported throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8
The essay is well-organised and coherent. It has a clear introduction, body paragraphs that present distinct points, and a concise conclusion that restates the opinion. Each paragraph discusses a specific aspect of the topic, and ideas are logically connected within and between paragraphs. The use of cohesive devices is effective in guiding the reader through the essay.

Lexical Resource: Band 8
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary. There is effective use of language related to agricultural practices, international trade, and cultural diversity. Phrases like “food sovereignty,” “arable land,” and “culinary experiences” showcase a varied vocabulary. The writer also effectively uses words like “utilising,” “conducive,” and “deprive,” displaying a good command of language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 8
The essay displays a strong command of grammar. Complex sentence structures are used accurately, and the sentences are varied.

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IELTS essay, topic: If a child commits a crime, should the child or the parents be punished? (discuss + opinion)

IELTS Model Essay Sample Band 8 October 2023

This essay topic was seen in a recent IELTS test in India

Some people believe that if a child commits a crime he or she should be punished, while others think it is the child’s parents who should be punished. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Sample Band 8 Essay

Opinions are divided on the topic of who should bear the most responsibility for crimes committed by minors. There are those who believe that the parents of children who commit crimes should be punished, while others disagree. I believe that while both arguments offer valid points, the decision ultimately depends on the individual circumstances surrounding each crime.

According to some people’s perspectives, all children regardless of their age should be held accountable for their actions, and that any punishment meted out to the child will serve as a deterrent to others. There is also the beneficial prospect of rehabilitation and instilling a sense of responsibility in the young offenders. Rehabilitation programs aimed at juvenile offenders can effectively reform their behaviour, thus making them responsible members of society.

Conversely, another perspective contends that parents should be held responsible, especially if negligence or poor upbringing has played a significant role in the child’s actions. The cornerstone of this argument is that parents play a vital foundational role in shaping a child’s moral compass. When parents neglect their duties or act as an inappropriate role model, they indirectly contribute to a child’s deviant behaviour. For instance, there have been a number of recent cases where children had unrestricted access to firearms at home and committed accidental crimes, which points directly to parental negligence.

In my opinion, a blanket approach cannot be applied in this complex matter. While children must learn about the consequences of their actions, it is also vital to assess parental roles in individual cases. A collaborative system which evaluates both the child’s understanding and parental neglect would be most appropriate and beneficial for everyone involved.

Teacher’s feedback:

This essay is a great example of a Band 8 level. Overall, it demonstrates a strong command of language, effectively addresses the task, maintains coherence, and provides a thoughtful analysis of the topic.

Task Response: Band 8
The essay provides a well-rounded response to the given prompt. It discusses both sides of the argument — holding children accountable for their actions and holding parents responsible, and then provides a clear opinion that a case-by-case assessment is necessary. The essay doesn’t merely present the arguments but also evaluates them critically, fulfilling the task requirements comprehensively.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs discussing different perspectives, and a concluding paragraph summarising the writer’s opinion. The ideas are logically organised, and the essay progresses smoothly from one point to the next. Linking words and phrases are used effectively to connect sentences and paragraphs, ensuring coherence and cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 8
The essay demonstrates a strong command of vocabulary. There is effective use of a variety of words and phrases, showing precision and accuracy. For instance, phrases like “juvenile offenders”, “deviant behavior”, and “parental negligence” showcase a rich vocabulary. The writer also uses words like “cornerstone” and “blanket approach”, demonstrating a good range of vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 8
The essay exhibits a high level of grammatical control. Complex sentence structures are used accurately, and there are no major grammatical errors that would impede understanding. The sentences are varied, indicating a good command of grammar.

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