School teachers are more responsible for social and intellectual development of students than parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is often argued that educators have greater responsibility developing students’ cognitive and social aspects compared to parents. I absolutely agree with this notion, as teachers are well-trained to teach formal lessons. Aside from that, school is the best place for children to socialize and .
It is known for a fact that parents play a vital role in the upbringing of their . Nevertheless, educating them at home alone does not always mean leading them to a bright future. For this reason, it is extremely important that children be given a formal education. This is when school teachers come into play. Apart from providing a conducive learning environment, most schools constantly update their faculty with various contemporary methods of teaching through seminars and trainings. This approach has long been practiced in order to ensure students can cope with technological advancements. Furthermore, practical exercises and laboratory experiments significantly help increase their problem-solving, logical thinking, and reasoning abilities.
With regard to social aspect, it is also at school where youngsters learn to interact with peers. Apart from their daily classroom interactions, varied extracurricular activities are likewise offered to them, depending on their interests. These can be scouting, sporting events, and other , just to name a few. These opportunities basically enhance leadership skills, camaraderie, and teamwork, may not be acquired at home alone. It is, therefore, not surprising that majority of friendships emanate from schools.
By and large, I strongly believe that when it comes to honing the overall academic and social skills of the youth, mentors have a more crucial role than parents. It is because they are professionally trained in performing so.
This essay seems worthy of Band 8. It would get a high Task Response score because all parts of the topic have been addressed – body paragraph 1 is on intellectual development and body paragraph 2 talks about the social development of students. The author organised information well, and used examples to support his/her points. The overall cohesion and coherence are achieved through skillful use of linking words and expressions. In terms of lexical resource and grammar there are some minor issues, however, they shouldn’t affect the score much. Well done!
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I have a question that when we are given scores for each skills separately in IELTS, why can’t we take them independent of each skill. I mean if I am getting desired score for three skills, then why have to reappear for all four?
Hi Nili, I know what you mean. It is often the case that someone gets the scores they need in 3 skills and they only need a higher mark in the 4th skill, but they have to take the entire test again. Unfortunately that is how IELTS system works. Only in re-evaluation people can apply to get 1 skill remarked, if they are confident that there’s something wrong with the marking of their test.
” it is extremely important that children be given a formal education”
I Think there a typo? “should be given” is that right?
Is it a correct a structure that you have used it here???
Hi Binu, are you asking about the structure of this entire essay or a particular sentence in it?
Both versions are acceptable, “be given” is American English and “should be given” is British English, they are both OK to use in IELTS.
Why did you say this in the last? Please explain.
In terms of lexical resource and grammar there are some minor issues, however, they shouldn’t affect the score much.
If you look at the corrections underlined in blue, hold your mouse over them and a better way to say the same thing, or the correct form will be displayed, those are the issues referenced in the teacher’s summary.
Okey, you’re saying that both British and American English are acceptable in IELTS, aren’tyou? But, I think, we’ve to use only one of them while we are passing the writing, or the speaking.
I still cannot find appropriate answer to this, what do you think ,am I correct?
Hi Jasur, yes, it is advisable to use either British or American English spelling, to create an impression of a consistent writer.
You didnt talk talk about parents role..may be less significant in whole essay…
“To what extend do you agree” type of essay, we do not need to address both part. As it is stated by the writer that she strongly agrees, this is how the essay is structured, i.e. body para 1: main idea1 +supporting details
2: main idea 2 + supporting details.
What happens if i partially agree it means that in para 1 i will tell about parents role and in para 2 there will be description of tutors role
So by this way did it affect our score in test?
I would like to improve my essay writing and also my writing technics on essay
Hi Kaetoa, you’re absolutely right, writing techniques matter in IELTS because they help you produce high-scoring responses every time. You can learn them from this book and if you’re looking for someone to check your writing and give you feedback, someone to tell you what you are doing well and what need improvement, our writing correction service can help.
I\’m studying for the TOEFL exam at the moment. however, the samples of ur IELTS essay is not only beneficial for my writing but they cast light on my brain for the speaking. I appreciate ur kind emails. Thanks a lot
Thank you for the kind feedback Asieh, it is much appreciated. Keep up the good work, you’ve been very creative to use ideas from essays for your speaking!
Hi, thanks for essays. Now I’m studying for IELTS certificate, at B1…. so I need some help from what kind of essays must be written to pass an exam for B2????
Thank You very much