IELTS essay, topic: Many criminals commit more crimes as soon as they are released from prison (reasons and solutions)
This essay topic was seen in recent IELTS test in Italy.
Many criminals commit more crimes as soon as they are released from prison. What do you think are the causes of this? What possible solutions can you suggest?
The problem of reoffending following the release of criminals from correctional facilities is likely caused by insufficient rehabilitation programmes and the negative perception of ex-offenders in society. Improving jail rehabilitation programmes and lowering stigma through legal changes can be potentially effective solutions.
At the root of recidivism lies the lack of comprehensive rehabilitation in prisons. Many facilities emphasise punishment over rehabilitation, failing to address the primary causes that drive individuals to crime. For example, offenders with poor mental health or substance abuse problems often receive insufficient treatment, which leads to high reoffending rates upon release. Similarly, offenders who committed crimes out of desperation stemming from living in abject poverty are likely to turn to crime again in order to survive. Moreover, the stigma attached to having a criminal record complicates reintegration. It diminishes their chances of obtaining stable employment and social acceptance, thus pushing them back into criminal activities.
Effective reduction of recidivism requires prisons to enhance rehabilitation programmes, incorporating mental health services, substance abuse treatment, and vocational training to improve employability. The duration of most sentences convicts are serving is of sufficient length to allow rectification of the issues that originally led them to crime, provided that prisons have expert-led and sufficiently funded programmes in place. Additionally, societal efforts to reduce the stigma associated with past criminals are crucial. This includes legal reforms to protect the rights of ex-offenders and public awareness campaigns to change societal perceptions. The success of countries like Sweden, with a focus on rehabilitation and low recidivism rates, demonstrates the effectiveness of this approach.
In conclusion, tackling recidivism effectively necessitates a holistic approach that includes better rehabilitation within prisons and proactive societal measures to reduce stigma. This combination can significantly enhance public safety and reduce crime rates by facilitating the successful reintegration of ex-offenders.
Teacher’s feedback:
This essay has all the prerequisites of Band 8 level writing.
Task Response: Band 8
You addressed the task comprehensively, providing a clear explanation of the causes and solutions for recidivism. The essay includes specific examples and a detailed discussion of both components of the prompt. Your conclusion succinctly reinforces your argument, demonstrating a full understanding of the task requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8
Your vocabulary is varied and contextually appropriate, showing a good range of lexical resource. Terms like “comprehensive rehabilitation,” “societal perceptions,” “public awareness campaigns,” and “rectification of issues” are used accurately and enhance the quality of the discussion. You effectively avoid redundancy and demonstrate the ability to use complex vocabulary to discuss specific ideas clearly and precisely.
Lexical Resource: Band 8
There is a good range of vocabulary used, including terms specific to the topic (habitat destruction, ecological balance, greenhouse gas emissions). The language is generally precise, and the writers uses varied and complex sentence structures.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 8
The essay showcases a wide range of grammatical structures with a high level of accuracy. Sentences are complex but clear, with appropriate use of punctuation and coordination. For example, your use of clauses and commas in sentences like “Many facilities emphasise punishment over rehabilitation, failing to address the primary causes that drive individuals to crime” demonstrates both complexity and control.
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