IELTS Writing Samples

Dieting can change a person’s life for the better or ruins one’s health completely. What’s your opinion?

Dieting seems to be of our life in this modern society, especially for those who are health conscious. Different people choose different type of dieting methods, trying to achieve what they believe to be good for either their health or physical appearance. In general, most of the people who diet are focusing on controlling their weight.

In our urban society, most of the working class not have the opportunity to consume . Their daily meals consist of fast food which contains large amounts of fat and salt. The most significant of this unhealthy lifestyle is the weight gain especially among those middle age working professionals.

Therefore, most of these young and energetic people have to control their diet in order to stay in shape either for their appearance or health. The most common and proper method of maintaining one’s weight is eating less oily food, preferably more green vegetables, fruits and alcohol.

However, some have resorted to losing weight by taking their diet to the extreme, not eating at all for days. Others will make themselves vomit after each meal. Many others will go for dieting medication and beverages that help them to lose their appetite. These unhealthy will cause internal damage in the long run.

In my opinion, dieting for better health is more important than solely for looking attractive. Individuals who wish to control their weight should seek professional if they are unable to reduce their weight after switching over to a healthy diet for a period of time. Losing weight and losing your health at the same time does not benefit any individual.

This essay needs some work. The first body paragraph explains the reason people have for dieting, whereas it should explain what are the advantages or the dangers of it. The second body paragraph explains how to diet, whereas it should present arguments for or against dieting. Therefore, the task is only partially covered here.

On the bright side, the sentences are well-structured and the vocabulary is sufficient, the usage of linking words is fluent and the spelling and grammar are mostly fine (see comments underlined in blue). Overall, this looks like a Band 6 essay.

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Even though globalization affects the world’s economy in a very positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.

Everything has two sides and the globalization is not exception. Our first thoughts about this topic include the process of global “McDonaldisation” and, generally speaking, spreading across the whole Globe.

Firstly, I would try to concentrate on the positive aspects of globalisation. As far as economy is concerned, like the Global Bank or IMF are always focused on developing the ‘Third World’ and helping poor people to combat their life obstacles (through loans and donations). Moreover, the world becomes an area of sharing thoughts (e.g. philosophical or economical doctrines), which become popular due to lack of barriers.

However, disadvantages of globalization are also widely known. Some people insist that because of this process, the spirit of countries and nations rapidly disappears. The integrity, established years ago is on the verge of collapsing. Furthermore, there’s a strong lobby of communists who , that the globalization indicates an uncontrolled reign of capitalists and slave work of lower labour-class. We should never forget about the detrimental impact of global investments on the environment – the green house effect or soar rains are triggered by globalization.

To sum up, globalization has both positive and negative influence on our everyday life. I can’t agree with the popular statement that we should try to avoid being affected by it. However, we must not forget about our surroundings and local communities. They have a great value which should last forever.

This essay is too short (233 words instead of mandatory 250), which may get it penalized. On the bright side, it covers the task and has a sound structure on the essay level. The paragraphs are coherent and are logically connected by linking words; the sentences are well-structured and the vocabulary is adequate. There were some inaccuracies, see comments underlined in blue. Overall, this looks like a band 6 essay.

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